Monday, July 30, 2007

What Would Bob Barker Do?

I dunno if you've heard. But Drew Carey is officially the new host of The Price is Right.

Oh come on. My boy Mueller was running a campaign for Chuck Woolery to replace my hero and yours, Bob Barker, earlier this year. Unfortunately, the internets don't appear to be as effective as previously suspected for this sort of grass roots campaign.

At any rate - we'll have to just wait and see what happens with Drew and TPIR. I'm hoping for continued good things. Who knows.

Maybe he'll finally put an end to all of the shady bidding tactics we've seen over the years.

Monday, July 23, 2007

If I had a Multi-Million Dollar Contract...

So I don't know if you've heard, but Michael Vick is an idiot.

A little while back Michael was accused of trying to sneak weed onto in airplane in the secret compartment of a water bottle. This is post 9/11 people. A water bottle? The idiotic nature of what he was doing should be fairly obvious. But just to drive the point home, here's an SNL clip that sums it up pretty well.




Vick was acquitted of those charges, but recently he found himself in some more trouble with the law. Last week he was indicted for training and fighting pit bulls. Pretty horrendous stuff, especially for a self proclaimed dog lover.

Senator Robert Byrd of West Virginia was particularly displeased with this recent turn of events and made sure to announce this to the Senate, who apparently wasn't busy with anything else that day. I'm not sure if he was making arguments against dog fighting or for term limits, but Senator Byrd hates dog fighting just as much as he loves repeating things three or more times. I wouldn't recommend watching this entire thing, but check out when there's about 5:10 left in the video.




We already know what I'd do with a million dollars, but I guess Vick is having trouble finding ways to legally spend all that green.

I fear that dog fighting is just the tip of the iceberg.

Monday, July 16, 2007

Just Doing my Civic Duty

Not often, but every once in a while I get a little burnt out on this whole "comic" thing. I'll have days of comedic writer's block, when even Carlos Mencia seems mildly humorous, or I'll spend 20 minutes trying to draw something really simple before I get anything that actually looks good, and even that is sometimes debatable.

There are a couple of things that really help me put my head down and power through those moments of doubt. One of which is my blog statistics. I have a couple of utilities that keep track of how many people read my blog on any given day, the majority of which are usually visitors from Mueller's blog, since he tends to link to this site more often than Arrested Development won critical acclaim.

The other thing that gives me motivation to keep at it is when people leave comments on my blog. I figure if somebody takes the time to actually type in a comment, then they must have enjoyed it a little bit more than the average item they find on the web.

Apparently, this motivation boost is a two way street. In case you don't read the comments people leave on my blog (and you should, Mueller usually leaves a smattering of hilarious links), last week yielded a fair share of good ones. There was one I found particularly interesting:

"Matthew Johnson said...
Your comics make my Tuesdays worth living :-)
July 10, 2007 10:56 PM"

Wow. With responsibility like that - I really have no choice but to keep saving people's lives.

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Thanks for reading everybody.

Monday, July 09, 2007

McDonald's Meets the Eye

This is gonna be a fairly short post, as I'm currently sitting outside of a Motel 8 with free wifi somewhere along Interstate 40. I'm on my way back to Orlando after visiting friends and family in Austin and Arkansas, but since I made a promise in my blog banner, which as I understand it is legally binding in all United States and principalities, I had to make sure and get a comic up today.

Anyway, while in Austin we decided to celebrate the independence of our country by watching computer generated robots demolish a small portion of it, by which of course I mean I saw the Transformers movie.

Although I like the idea of driving a car that has a mind of its own, I think that its motivation may differ from my own occasionally, which could become problematic.

I suppose the only real requirement I would have for such a vehicle would be that it's easily duped.

Mild spoiler alert. The movie Transformers involves cars that turn into robots.


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Feel free to gimme a ring today if you get bored. I'll be driving for a while.

Sunday, July 01, 2007

Family Values

I'm not going to lie. I love television.

Just like my boy Mueller, I watch a lot of TV. I'll be flipping the channels, and all of a sudden BAM! - Wheezy gets sucked into a weekend marathon of Law and Order: SVU. These things happen.
And if it's in HD? Forget about it. I'll watch anything in HD. UFC, dolphins (the football team or the aquatic mammal), guys getting tagged in the family jewels, doesn't matter. If it's in High-Def I'm all about it.

Once in a while though, I'll accidentally hit something that churns the very soul. If I had some way of avoiding these shows without sacrificing TV altogether, I would.


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If you didn't catch my Show and Tell post from Saturday, check it out quick.